So much time, so many thoughts…….

First and foremost, I hope that everyone is staying healthy, safe and somewhat sane during this crazy time. I also want to thank all of the people who are battling this virus front and center and those that are keeping the world running while most of are us staying in our homes.

The Cabral family is actually faring pretty well during this time. I have always been someone who keeps thing like toilet paper and paper towels overstocked on a regular basis so we are doing fine over here. Trevor is his usual panicky self and is making sure we are always washing our hands. I have been working hard for the past four years to make sure I don’t get sick so I am doing fine as well. The kids have been great. They obviously have their normal kid moments but for the most part during the week when Trevor and I are both working they do their best to be well behaved and quiet. They do demand our full attention and entertainment on the weekends though.

My first round of chemo did not go well. The meds made me terribly sick and i had to be taken off of them after only four days. It took my body a few weeks to recover and for all of my blood counts to be good enough to start again. I started my second round of chemo, at a reduced dosage, on March 11th, just as the Corona Virus chaos was starting to kick off. While I felt better than I did on the first round it was still really tough and I felt horrible. If there was a side effect listed as being possible- I had it. I am losing my hair (something that no one else on these meds had happen to them), had terrible,terrible GI issues and had blisters on my hands and feet. Being the stubborn (and somewhat stupid) person that I am, I powered through my horrible, near death feelings and continued on the meds so that I could complete the round. Apparently this was a HUGE no no as I “got in trouble” with my oncologist as I allowed myself to get too sick. As she put it “They do not give prizes to people who power through horrible side effects.” Essentially I am putting poison in my body daily and too much poison could “kill the host not just the Cancer”. I get it now and will never make that mistake again!!!!

I was thankful to be home during that time. It was tough but it was nice to be able to be sick and not have to go anywhere. Practices, stores, events, etc. Trust me I didn’t feel this way while going through it at the time. A couple of weeks ago, when feeling my worst, and quarantined- I was ready to throw in the towel and for the first time really questioned if I had much more fight in me. Having Cancer is not easy and with so many unknowns around us during this crazy time, it was all a little bit too much. I am feeling better now and have a more positive outlook on everything and am ready to start round three (at another reduced dose) tomorrow.

While this is such a trying time for everyone and we are all fighting our own battles with this new norm, I am thankful for this time. Thankful for the quiet, slowed down version of our life which we are quickly becoming accustomed too. I have always kept our schedules packed in hopes it takes our mind off of my Cancer and keeps us busy and making so many memories. With this slowed down life we are making more memories than I could have ever imagined. Doing the puzzles and playing the games that have been in closets for years, mommy becoming (or at least trying to become) a kindergarten and third grade teacher, ( GOD BLESS all teachers!!!!) , making Tik Toks as a family, google chats with friends and family. It’s funny b/c during this quarantine i have spoken to friends and family more in the past few weeks than ever before.

As always, we have been overwhelmed with the outpouring of care, concern and offers of help that have been extended to us. I am so thankful, now more than ever, to have so many loving and caring people in my life. I can only hope that I can. have or will be able to reciprocate the love to all of you. I hope that everyone stays safe and healthy.

XO

***** I also originally forgot to share that while i have been sick from the Chemo, it IS WORKING. My scans a couple of weeks ago showed that the tumors in my liver had shrunk from the medicine. The goal is to now find a dose that I can tolerate and still have it attack the Cancer.

4 thoughts on “So much time, so many thoughts…….

  1. Sara Stewart says:

    Thinking of you always, April. I pray that you start to see some positive results from the next chemo round and enjoy this quality time at home with Trevor and the kids. Happy Birthday to you later this week as well!

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